Do you have Black Eyes Syndrome? Time to abolish the Inner B*tch and find our Inner Goddess/God!

Who set the standard for what we are supposed to look like?  Aren’t you supposed to look like yourself?  Isn’t that person beautiful?  Then how come we are constantly, forever, always beating ourselves up?  Man oh man, if our mental problem was a physical problem, and our thoughts could leave marks, we would have bruises all over our body.  Imagine how many of us would be walking around with the face of a fight!  Only the other person in the ring is ourselves!  Our Inner Critic or Inner B*tch as I like to say!  If your Inner Bitch were a real person would you be friends with her or him?  Heck no.  Our IB isn’t our nice, that would be our Inner Goddess or Inner God.   They say we are most like the 5 people we surround ourselves with so think about your IB being your NUMBER 1!  Yikes! I for one, do not look at others with the criticism I dish out to myself, so why am I doing it to me?  Partly, because back in the day, all you saw was super skinny, no butts, no curves, when you opened up a magazine.  We have been comparing ourselves for far too long on the wrong ideals.  I’ll never forget when Linda Hamilton caught my eye in The Terminator.  I was so blown away by her muscular body in that movie and thought she looked amazingly beautiful.  That was a new beginning.


Life happens. We eat, we drink, we have parties, we miss the gym, we don’t work out, we have shame, guilt, we have kids, work, appointments, volunteering, laundry, we should sleep, we have pets, we have loss, we have life.  Don’t we have enough going on that we don’t need our Inner Bitch telling us more of what we already know?!  Ok, so life has been busy and I am not what?  Perfect?  Who says?  What is the standard that we work off of?  Is it national?  International?  Is there a committee for the Perfect Standard? I can’t seem to find it on Google!   Since I was a kid, I cannot walk past a mirror that I have to look into and not turn to the side. A check in.  As if after peeing, I am going to be so much thinner!  Hmm, how do I look?  Should I pull up the pant just a little to pull in the stomach before I head back out?  Or If I could just pull my face back a smidge I could take five years off.   I am not saying we should not work on our health, our fitness or ourselves, because I do it every single day.  My point is, let’s do it from another angle.  Let’s start by being nicer to ourselves.  Stressing over looks holds on to cortisol and that holds on to belly fat.  So let it go.  We are where we are today.  We got here for a reason.  Those reasons range in difficulty from simply being unaware to major life traumas.  So the first thing we can do and we can do it right now is GIVE OURSELVES A BREAK.  Start with some love so that you can start to believe that you are totally worth whatever it is you are seeking to do.


The nutritional guidelines were wrong for years, so if doctors and nutritionists and the government can get it wrong, then maybe it’s up to us to get it right!   I’ll need your help to be on my committee.  I will need as many of you as possible to join me and take the pledge!  Time to Abolish the Inner Bitch!


Here goes:

  • We will demolish our Inner Bitch and take away her/his power.
  • With that we will abolish the eye roll, grunt or sigh in the mirror.
  • We will replace our Inner Bitch with our Inner Goddess or Inner God.
  • Oh how nice that will be! She/He loves us and is so kind!
  • We will train our IG on our new rules and she/he will follow our lead, we will no longer follow theirs and our mood will not be based on what the bitch says on how we look, but how the IG treats us.
  • Our IG must tell us daily that we are rocking our mind, body and soul.
  • Our IG will look in the mirror and do the Fonze (who’s old enough to know what I mean, lol. Comb out, Ayyyyyyyyy.  Yeah, I’m good.
  • We will stand tall and be grateful for all body parts.
  • We will say Thank You to a complement and NOT respond back with a negative retort.


The new standard will start with exactly where we are today.  If it’s not where you want to be, that’s ok, in love we will move forward to amazing health.  We will honor our process and our progress.   Is this something you can start to do?
You are an Iron Beauty don’t forget that!

Look for Life and Fitness coaching coming soon on our website as we revamp and rev up!  Jump on board the train of moving each other forward in the best way possible, and keep surrounding yourself with people that want the best for you!  I know we do!


See you in great shape!
Your Iron Beauty Coach
Kathi Sottosanti
Health and Wellness Coach
CPT, Stalker, Friend

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