MY SHORTS DON’T FIT. HELLO SUMMER!

Memorial day weekend is here and this morning I had my moment of truth. The bathing suit and shorts moment! Nothing fits! All to small. I couldn’t button my shorts. The competition is in 5 days. Put a skirt on!

I took today off.  I haven’t had a day off since? I actually don’t know when. I have been working like crazy for over two years now.  Keeping up with our growing Iron Beauty business, managing social media pages, growing a coaching department at No Body Denied, coaching countless number of people through their weight loss journey to better health with our nutrition products, public speaking, corporate coaching, it goes on, all while raising 5 kids, two whom are graduating this year so the activities are crazy.

The one thing that I have to work around, that many people can’t understand, is my training regimen. I have been working out my whole adult life. I do not function well without it. In fact, I love being on a structured program. I lift weights to manage my real life stress. It keeps me sane. Helps me escape for a little while and mostly because it just feels good.

There were all different phases of training over the years of course, having kids, 4 of them in 5 years, while working in the city until #3 came along. This often meant the treadmill in the basement, with a baby in a bouncy seat sucking on a pacifier, or the double stroller around town or months of wishing I could but didn’t.

I have been lifting weights forever but for the last two years I shifted focus to powerlifting. I said out loud to my friend/coach, “I don’t want to gain weight”. To which he replied, “Then this sport is not for you.” That made me mad, I thought, yes it is and I shut up. I was not thinking right. I had to experience it to understand, as much as I knew how the body has to adapt, I was still thinking I could stay my weight and just get stronger. Nope. When you put that kind of stress on your body, such as lifting heavy loads, your body has to adapt to that stress by adding muscle. My body had to put on weight. Which it did, about 8 pounds. And yes that’s mostly muscle. I work hard motivating so many all winter to stay on path and so many for weight loss. I am now sitting in my car on the way to the beach in a bathing suit with a skirt on that is no bigger than a bandana on me now, but was all I had while flying through the house trying to get ready to leave. My goals are not typical and I have to remember that.

My legs and glutes are bigger. Ok, so deep breath, pause and reflect. The shorts that fit last year could not lift the weight that I can lift today. My body adapted to my sport. I’m not skinny, but I am stronger at 52 than I was at 22, 32, or 42. I guess you’ll be seeing me in skirts this summer! Note to self: I will embrace my body for what it can accomplish. I will look at the size of the bar I am lifting, not the tag in my shorts! I have been training very hard for a reason. That is where my focus will stay!


QUITTING IS JUST A SELF PITY PARTY WITH M&M’S! HERE’S HOW TO HAVE SUCCESS IRON BEAUTY STYLE!

It’s not working and you want to give up!

Let me ask you this, where did you start?  Were you happy when you started your  program? No.  That’s why you started one!  Let’s use weight loss for example.  You’ve lost weight and it stopped working, you’ve plateaued.  You say it stopped working.  Nothing stopped working, your body is still working. It’s a plateau. You are frustrated and want to quit.  Quit what?  Yourself?  It’s HARD! Actually, it’s really hard.  Any kind of change, whether it be weight gain for lean muscle, strength gains or weight loss can be very frustrating at times.  We don’t have all the answers, we don’t know where we’re messing up, we can’t figure out why it’s not working.  It’s so frustrating you want to quit.  That’s a panic move that will get you nowhere.  Actually it will get you somewhere, right back where you started!  If that’s what you want then go ahead and quit!
You’ve heard the phrase, nobody said it was easy.  Maybe you thought it would be.  It’s not easy and it’s not short term.  It takes, time, patience and a constant flow of good choices.  Daily choices. We could blame it on this or that, or we could open ourselves up to change.

WHEN IT GETS FRUSTRATING AND YOU WANT TO QUIT THAT IS YOUR SIGN TO TURN UP THE HEAT!  THAT IS THE BREAKING POINT TO NOT BREAK, BUT GO HARDER!  WE WILL NOT QUIT.

When you want to throw in the towel, that is the smoke signal to work even harder, maybe harder than you’ve worked in your life.  I know you don’t want to hear that, because you are already working hard, but if you are not OVER-TRAINING, which is story for another day, then you have to take it to another level.  The weight you carried before wouldn’t let you do the kind of workout you can do now.  Every single day upon waking set your intentions on having a good day.  Don’t wing it.  Know in your thoughts how your day should go by planning and preparing.  Plans change yes, but if you have a plan then you are more likely to stay on path.  Be willing to change and reevaluate your plan.  There are no solid right and wrong answers that work for all, just trial and error.  And when it stops working you DON’T QUIT, you change your path.  And if that doesn’t work you change it again.  I don’t mean big changes either, small ones.  Tweaks to the plan.  If you change too much you won’t know what didn’t work, so make small changes at a time.  We are all so unique in our physical make up that we are all going to have different experiences.

QUITTING ONLY EQUALS SELF PITY PARTY WITH M&M’s.  It’s saying you’re going to stop eating well and working out because it doesn’t work.  It does work.  And when it stops, we don’t stop unless we want to go backwards!  Instead of putting the energy in to feeling sorry for yourself, let it go and say, ok, what else can I do?  I’m in.  I’m tired, I’m frustrated, I want to give up, but ok Kathi, you pain in the ASS, I’ll do it!  Quitting is not an option actually at all, now is it?  It is simply a very loud signal to NOT GIVE UP.  Now you know, easy doesn’t work.  Get in the game, stay in the game, head in the game.  Fight the fight till we get it right.  The truth is, what you think is extremely hard, is only because your body is trying it for the first time.  There is an inner athlete in you dying to come out.  Let’s find it and set it free!  I believe in you!

See you in great shape,
Your Iron Beauty Coach
Kathi Sottosanti
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NACHOS, BUFFALO WINGS, MOZZARELLA STICKS. FOOD IS ENERGY OR A BIG NAP!

nachosWhen you sit down to eat. Do you think about what you are putting in to your body and how it will make you feel after?  For the majority, the answer is no. Even for the health conscious we’re not always thinking about the purpose or the aftermath. Go to any crowded restaurant or public area and you will see so many people just eating and ordering away.  If you are reading this blog then you are already drawn to the idea of becoming more aware of your health both mind and body.
 
Does this sound familiar?   I remember the days.  Kids were young and we would go to a family friendly restaurant.  It’s right in front of you and looks so good!  You’re at a restaurant and the picture of the nachos on the menu draws you in.  Yeah, let’s get them. And then we’ll have mozzarella sticks to start, buffalo wings . . . .  and then you place your real order!  Before your real meal arrives, you’re already FULL.  Not even a thought went in to the nutrients.  It’s actually how most people live.  We are not thinking about how these foods will serve our body or how we will become inflamed.  It’s food for taste not fuel.
What if you really paid attention to how you feel after you eat your meals?  You know how you feel after a meal like that when you overload.  UGH.  I am SO full.  I just need to unzip my jeans, open the button.  Take a nap.  Hit the sofa.  A meal like that is like an army attacking your body to shut it down.  Now your insides have to go to work and digest the overload, break it down and get rid of it.  Oh, but you probably won’t get rid of it because you didn’t burn enough so you get lucky enough to KEEP IT!   What a gift.  It tasted so good and now it’s yours. The extra calories will be stored in fat cells.  Many menus have great offerings.  Get creative.  Skip sauces and ask for them on the side.  Dip in your food instead of having it all over.  Crispy anything means fried.  Opt for vinegar and olive oil for your dressing.  Salad dressings are often loaded with sugar and fat.  Ask for twice the veggies.  Get in to the habit of eating half the meal every time. Then take half home.  I know that when I am half way done, I put the fork down.  Wait, let the full kick in.  Eat slowly.  Enjoy every bite!
THINK!  Mindful eating.
How does the food make me feel?
Does a plate full of nachos and a burger make you feel AWESOME when you’re done or are you ready to go home and sleep?
FOOD IS ENERGY.  Look at food and think how will this serve my body.  Will it give me energy, help me build lean muscle so I can burn more calories?  The right food will boost you.  We are going to get to know what serves our bodies well.  Why?  Because then we can be machines!
See you in great shape,
Your Iron Beauty Coach
Kathi Sottosanti
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The “S” WORD. SABOTAGE! Why we do it and how to change it!

The process of losing weight, or changing our bodies, takes time and isn’t always easy.  The process of changing our minds can be even harder!  It is completely normal to hit a plateau.  Every “body” is completely different.  There is no one size fits all.  Are your hormones balanced?  Do you have a healthy gut?  How much lean muscle do you have?  Is your thyroid in check? Do you get enough sleep?  How high is your stress level? These are just some of the factors that should be taken into consideration when struggling with weight loss.

The one aspect that we don’t often talk about or address is how you treat yourself?  This is a big piece of the pie (I don’t mean that literally) that most don’t think about.  How do you speak to yourself about your progress?  Do you get mad at yourself?  What do you tell yourself as you fall asleep? Do you even know to talk to yourself?  What do you tell yourself upon waking?   That conversation can really have an effect on your results.  Our thoughts become our actions.  When you are falling asleep at night, or as you wake in the morning, is when your conscious mind and subconscious mind cross over, and you have an incredible opportunity to mold your day and your life.  Your subconscious is your silent boss and pretty much runs your life.  You should have tremendous respect for your boss! You breathe, your heart beats, you turn left when you know how to get somewhere, you don’t even have to make the plan, your body just knows what to do and legs start to turn, the torso turns your body just moves!  Fascinating. Thanks Boss.

Now imagine the power that you have to change your world as you teach your subconscious about you.  You have a choice.  You can thank yourself at night for trying or you can tell yourself how much you suck.  Either way your subconscious will believe you.  Choice.  You hate your legs.  I learned a long time ago in the book, The Power of the Subconscious Mind, by Joe Murphy, that your subconscious cannot take a joke.  As you fall asleep thinking, “I was so bad today”, your brain hears how bad you were and believes what it hears.  Your words start to shape your spiral down, when they can lead you to a better place.  A happier conscious state that takes better actions.  This is not easy, I know, but it is something you can practice becoming very aware of in life.  When we don’t and we continually live in frustration, and get mad at ourselves, then SABOTAGE kicks in.   The “S” word. You have lost patience.  It’s not working on your time.  The answer: Fk it.  I am going to cheat and eat.  Why not, it’s not working anyway.  Then the cheat, becomes a whole day, then a week.  As you fall off path feeling sorry for yourself, you drown in crappy food only to realize that you feel even worse.  Now you are going in the other direction.  WEIGHT GAIN.  After all that work, not only are you gaining weight, the bad food doesn’t even feel good.  You are better off on the plateau, feeling good with the right food, continuing to make baby steps and small changes,  versus the idea of sabotaging your progress by eating away at your frustrations.  Couple that with negative self- talk, and you’re really going to feel down.

Would you punish your child if they were working really hard and trying their absolute best in school, struggling, but working, and you knew it and they came home with a C+?  NO, at least I hope not. That would be so discouraging to that child.  Give yourself the same encouragement.  YOU ARE TRYING YOUR BEST!

Actions:
Honor your body with good food and don’t give up.  It is a long process for some.  Punishing, sabotaging your progress with junk, because you are frustrated will make you feel like garbage.  Hold on to where you are and make small tweaks.  Sometimes small tweaks will do the trick over time.  Just keep going.  A “treat” meal once is week is great.  Tell the body you are not in starvation mode and will be better able to release weight.   That’s very different and has nothing to do with sabotaging.

BE NICE to yourself.  Stop treating yourself differently than others that you love.  You need your love too.  As you fall asleep tell your subconscious what you want from life.  Do this as a real exercise.  Your subconscious cannot take a joke, it’s very literal so whatever you tell it, it will believe and that is how you will start to live.  As you wake, do the same, but make it for that day.  Today, I will be patient with myself.  I will relax in to my food.  I will honor my body.  I will not hate the legs that carry me from one place to another.  The arms that hold my hands that allow me to hug.  Practice.  Then make it a habit to thank yourself for the day’s efforts as you fall asleep.  You have the POWER to shape your mind, to change your thoughts, your future and your whole outlook on life.  Start this immediately.

Good effort today Kathi.  You worked hard, and gave it your best. Tomorrow you will accomplish so much of what you want to do.  Goodnight.  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

See you in great shape,
Your Iron Beauty Coach

Kathi Sottosanti

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CALORIES ARE ENERGY. YOU FEAR THE FOOD THAT CAN ACTUALLY MAKE YOU STRONGER!

You won’t eat that, there are 240 calories in it, that is way too high for a snack!  Is it?  What does that mean?  What if it has 240 calories of golden nutrition for your body, but you say no because you think it’s too high in calories.  What if I were to tell you that that 240 calories were not only amazing energy for your body but that your selection of food was going to repair your body, feed your muscles, reduce your body fat and make you stronger?  Would you eat it then?  Are you looking at the calories and getting scared?  You could be turning away the best nutrition for your machine, your body, and your success.

Kathi big weightI know a ton of skinny people.  Skinny.  They won’t eat what’s too caloric.  I am hoping that that word starts to have a negative affect on you.  Skinny. That word that used to be sexy at one time, yes it’s true.  Twiggy time.  That takes me back to the days of iceberg lettuce and Tab in 7th grade.  I would order a salad like a know it all snob and ask for iceberg lettuce ONLY with a Tab and lemon!  Dumb ass, that was the least beneficial.  I was young.  And skinny.   I know some of you are reading this only wishing to hear for once that someone would say, “wow you look skinny”.  But I don’t think that is the gift.  I think the gift if fit.  I am surrounded by women and men of all sizes. I am watching my friends on FB just crushing it and I am so proud of them.  Some are bigger then others but they are strong, they are fit, they are healthy and they are FABULOUS.  That’s hot.  You are not “skinny” but you are doing Mud Runs, triathlons, Warrior Dashes, Ironmen and shit that most people only dream of!  You are hot!  You are fit.  You need to fuel your body with great foods. Do not fear the calories.  Drown yourself in nutrition.  Fat doesn’t make you fat, it’s fuel for your body.  You are strong.  You know what scares me is the woman who comes in every day to do cardio forever, then weighs herself.  It breaks my heart but that’s another blog altogether.  If you are training don’t fear food that cost you calories, your body needs the good stuff to repair and grow.  Be smart.  I know you will have questions after this and there is so much more to learn.  We are just starting our journey.  Respond as you see FIT and we will talk.  More to come.  Thank you for reading!

See you in great shape,
Your Iron Beauty Coach
Kathi Sottosanti

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PUDEKCUF! YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT MEANS?


I am so glad to hear that you are coming here for motivation and a check in.  Life is real. Thank you for printing and sharing with your friends and passing this around.  I heard some beautiful feedback today and I am so grateful!  So here goes today’s rant.  Thank you for reading!

I have told many of you about the word I created.  The word is PUDEKCUF. Pronounced poodi-cuff.

You have an issue.  You think you are alone.  You can’t talk to anyone about it because you are afraid people will think you are crazy.  So you stay quiet and suffer.  You eat or drink your woes away and are not going in the direction you would like.

I had this beautiful, angelic looking young woman from Germany take my class a couple of years ago and at the end of our total stranger 30 minutes, she came up to me and said, “I cannot spend one more day throwing up!”  Just like that.  She was 23 and had been throwing up her food since she was 13.  Her parents didn’t know, but now I did.  I said, “You are not leaving this gym until you talk to me, let’s go to my desk now!”.  I asked her if she had heard of the word PUDEKCUF?  She said no.  I said of course you haven’t because I made it up!  She laughed.  You have been throwing up for 10 years.   You think you are fkd up right?  “YES”, she said.  Well, what if I were to tell you that you are just the opposite?  What if I told you that because you have an ISSUE that you are totally NORMAL!  She hugged me.  We became instantly connected.  I told her what PUDEKCUF meant and she felt right at home with me.  Once she trusted me I told her the toilet does not need her nutrients.  Her body does.  Giving it up to the toilet meant she would hold on to body fat.  Releasing those calories sends a message to the body that you are in starvation mode, so the body will HOLD on to the body fat.  People who suffer from Bulimia have more body fat than then the normal person making it the constant curse.  It is so important to understand that YOUR BODY NEEDS THE NUTRITION.  So eat to grow healthy.

What is normal?  Normal means you have issues.  Tell me whose life is perfect?  No one. Everyone of us will suffer at some point, loss of loved ones, financial distress, kids, parents, marriage, relationships, disease, all of it.   EVERYONE.  Every ONE of us has stress and life to deal with and that is real.  That is normal.  So here I am to tell you that if you have an issue YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  Please hear me.  If you have an issue you are normal.  So what is PUDECKUF?  It’s FUCKED UP backwards!  Yes it is.  So you think you are fucked up, which makes you feel alone, but the truth is if you are FUCKED UP you are totally NORMAL.  That’s why I created PUDEKCUF.  To tell the world that we are all one team.  There isn’t one human being out there who isn’t subject to STUFF.  We all have it so let’s make PUDEKCUF a household word because being fkd up is really so NORMAL!  Your are a part of Iron Beauty which means you are never alone!  We love you!

See you in great shape!
Your Iron Beauty Coach,
Kathi Sottosanti

©


I MET THE FUTURE YOU AND GUESS WHAT I SAW!

BLOGIMAGEThe month is January 2017.  I met Future You.  You are so happy.  There is a glow about you.  I can just feel the energy radiate off of your body.  You are walking lighter, like you have more freedom.  Old You did not have the same zest.  Old You was sluggish, walked a little slower.  You used to give me a half hi.  A half nod up.  Old You didn’t have the faith.   Old you couldn’t see the Future You and walked in mediocrity for years.  Old You didn’t believe you were worthy of feeling amazing.  It wasn’t meant to be.  Only those people deserve it.  Why on earth wouldn’t you?

Until that day.  Remember that day in January 2016?  The day we spoke and it FINALLY kicked in, and you said the words, “OK Kathi, I’ll do it”.  I’ll never forget that day.  I saw the conviction in your eyes mixed with doubt and fear.  But there was hope and I knew we had a lot of work to do.

Your self esteem was low.  You didn’t think you were capable of getting below that number on the scale. You hadn’t seen it in years.  You didn’t know you were strong enough to move the weight or take a jog.  But you said, “OK Kathi, I’ll do it”.   And then you started.  You began to move.  You made smart food choices.  You started cooking on the weekend to get ready for the week.  You let yourself have a fun meal on a weekend night, but otherwise you pretty much stayed on path.  You lost a pound. Hmm.  One pound led to another.  You started to believe. Your energy started to perk up a little.  You weren’t thinking about the nap and the sofa quite as much.  Then there was that day in early February when you came in and said, “Kathi that’s it, I have given up the _____.”  And you haven’t had it since.  I was so proud of you.   That day in January was the day Old You decided to become Future You.  You made small changes over the course of the year.  But combined, they were big changes toward better health for You.  Old You made so many beautiful changes.  You feel free in the Future.  You breathe lighter.  You are proud of yourself.  Your family is proud of you.  It was not easy for sure, but you did the work.  May, June and July came around, you were already a changed person and by September you had it nailed down.  The holidays were not a struggle, they were filled with Joy.  You LOVED your outfit.  Everything fit so well, but more importantly you have the stamina to get through the craziness. You developed amazing strength, confidence and a belief in yourself that felt so warm and right.

Future You has NO REGRETS.  Future You would like to take a moment to thank Old You from the bottom of your heart.  You cannot imagine your life any other way and you are only so happy.  You cannot thank yourself enough, for saying the words, “OK Kathi, I’m in!”  back in January of 2016!  We now know, since I met you in the Future, that is was worth every ounce of work you put in to this year!  We can do this.  You can do this! We are an Iron Beauty team!

See you in great shape,
Your Iron Beauty Coach

Kathi Sottosanti

©


SELF WORTH FOR THE FIRST TIME!

blogMy thoughts and projects come from seedlings that begin with conversations that I have with you.  Your words start to formulate in my mind and I hear what you say and I have to find a way to move you forward.  My brain just starts to fire up.  Today we start our next project and the main subject is you.

I want to talk about SELF WORTH.  Sure it’s for easy to say:  It starts from within.  Dig deep.  It has to come from you.  But what if you never had it?  What if you are the person who didn’t grow up with it?  What if your parents didn’t instill self worth in your being and then you went on to relationships that allowed you to stay beneath it all.  How are you supposed to dig deep to find what doesn’t exist?  You’re not good enough.  You’re not pretty enough and the world will eat you up and make you believe it’s your fault since you aren’t strong enough to fight back.  UGH, shame on them!  That’s abuse of the weak.  You cannot make a change because you have no clue where to start and when you leave the company of the positive you go right back to the blanket and sofa.  You are safer being lost.

Where do you start?  #projectprettyinsideandout.

Here’s what I will ask you to do.  First.  Sign a contract with yourself and date it.  Write it on a piece of paper or send a text to yourself, but you have to write it to get it out in to the universe.  Here is one that I had a friend write and we both signed it today:  I, ___________, will release X pounds by February 29th (my birthday), I am promising myself to attempt to like myself a little more each day.  While today I don’t feel worthy, I know I should for the sake of myself and my boys.  I am going to to commit to change.  I am going to release the fear of success and embrace the unknown by Memorial Day weekend, for real.  No more bullshit.  I own myself!  Dated and signed today!

Now we begin the journey to not digging deep from within, but doing the work required to build a body, mind and soul that you will actually like.  Then admire.  Then love.  It will be hard but you are worth the work.  Get out of bed.  Take care of your outside.  If your outside depressed like your inside that’s all anyone will see.  You don’t feel like getting dressed.  Do it anyway.  Dress as if you are already there.   Let’s trick yourself.   Let’s do this every day until you actually do feel as you look.  Sometimes we have to break open the mind to get the body to move, but other times we have to break open the body so the mind has something to believe in that’s possible.  It’s 2016.  Don’t you think it’s time?  I do.  Check out our Facebook page for steps in to a New You.

See you in great shape,

Kathi Sottosanti

Your Iron Beauty Coach

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