Ever feel like you have to escape? Life is a lot. We are on overdrive and so incredibly plugged in. It’s a disease that needs a name. It’s like watching a sci-fi movie as I walked through the city today. Imagine hearing 100 phone conversations in quick blurbs while you’re not speaking. Just observing. It’s so easy to go on overload. Everyone is talking. Is anyone paying attention?

Our kids are so plugged in they’re not living in reality they’re living in phonality. It’s so sad. It’s a life based around who’s calling, who’s face-timing, who’s snap-chatting, who’s texting. Did you know there was something called Phantom Texting? A problem facing the under 20 crowd where they think they hear their phone go off. JEEZZZZZZZ. Let me ask you this. Do you look at your phone because you are looking to see what’s up from 2 minutes ago? YES YOU DO. It’s a disease. An addiction. Who’s writing us? What’s new? We eat dinner and have a conversation, yet we cannot wait to get to our phones. So once dinner is kind of officially over we grab our devices and it’s good bye. Why? Because we put our friends on temporary hold only to have dinner with our family. We actually can’t wait to get back to them but we do the obligatory dinner time. That’s so fucked up. We took a temporary break from our real world to plug into our FAMILY TIME! WOW! What the hell is happening to us? We get jittery because the dinner conversation is going on a little too long and we have to RESPOND. To whom? Who is more important than our children and yes I am guilty!

Today I had had enough. I unplugged. I got on a train and went to the city where no one knows my name. I was mindful. It was so interesting. I walked a ton. I sat in parks. I listened to music that was so beautiful. I watched as a couple dance at 4:30 in broad daylight in a park and thought how cool is that?! I watched a squirrel eat out of a woman’s hand like it was a house pet. I had no WIFI. I did my best to disconnect and read, with the exception of checking in on my kids after school. I felt the sun on my face as I sat on the park bench. I felt the presence of the stranger that asked to sit with me. I connected with no one and everyone. They were a part of my peace in a weird sort of way. How can we break this horrible disease of human disconnectedness? The stacking game is great, friends over phones, young people stacking their phones on the table so they can have real time with each other. BRAVO. We need to start seeing each other. Paying attention to each other. The phone gives us so much love that it makes it easy to not love what is right in front of you. That is bullshit. Can we turn it around? We’re doomed in my opinion if we don’t. Pay attention or pay your phone bill. You tell me what’s more important.

Love always,
Your Iron Beauty Coach
Kathi Sottosanti


I am so glad to hear that you are coming here for motivation and a check in.  Life is real. Thank you for printing and sharing with your friends and passing this around.  I heard some beautiful feedback today and I am so grateful!  So here goes today’s rant.  Thank you for reading!

I have told many of you about the word I created.  The word is PUDEKCUF. Pronounced poodi-cuff.

You have an issue.  You think you are alone.  You can’t talk to anyone about it because you are afraid people will think you are crazy.  So you stay quiet and suffer.  You eat or drink your woes away and are not going in the direction you would like.

I had this beautiful, angelic looking young woman from Germany take my class a couple of years ago and at the end of our total stranger 30 minutes, she came up to me and said, “I cannot spend one more day throwing up!”  Just like that.  She was 23 and had been throwing up her food since she was 13.  Her parents didn’t know, but now I did.  I said, “You are not leaving this gym until you talk to me, let’s go to my desk now!”.  I asked her if she had heard of the word PUDEKCUF?  She said no.  I said of course you haven’t because I made it up!  She laughed.  You have been throwing up for 10 years.   You think you are fkd up right?  “YES”, she said.  Well, what if I were to tell you that you are just the opposite?  What if I told you that because you have an ISSUE that you are totally NORMAL!  She hugged me.  We became instantly connected.  I told her what PUDEKCUF meant and she felt right at home with me.  Once she trusted me I told her the toilet does not need her nutrients.  Her body does.  Giving it up to the toilet meant she would hold on to body fat.  Releasing those calories sends a message to the body that you are in starvation mode, so the body will HOLD on to the body fat.  People who suffer from Bulimia have more body fat than then the normal person making it the constant curse.  It is so important to understand that YOUR BODY NEEDS THE NUTRITION.  So eat to grow healthy.

What is normal?  Normal means you have issues.  Tell me whose life is perfect?  No one. Everyone of us will suffer at some point, loss of loved ones, financial distress, kids, parents, marriage, relationships, disease, all of it.   EVERYONE.  Every ONE of us has stress and life to deal with and that is real.  That is normal.  So here I am to tell you that if you have an issue YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  Please hear me.  If you have an issue you are normal.  So what is PUDECKUF?  It’s FUCKED UP backwards!  Yes it is.  So you think you are fucked up, which makes you feel alone, but the truth is if you are FUCKED UP you are totally NORMAL.  That’s why I created PUDEKCUF.  To tell the world that we are all one team.  There isn’t one human being out there who isn’t subject to STUFF.  We all have it so let’s make PUDEKCUF a household word because being fkd up is really so NORMAL!  Your are a part of Iron Beauty which means you are never alone!  We love you!

See you in great shape!
Your Iron Beauty Coach,
Kathi Sottosanti